Black Girl Unlost - Latest Comments

Re: The Adjustment Period

Monica — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 10:40:29 -0000

I totally understand how you feel. I recently ended a relationship because of this very issue. We both had been single for quite some time and the adjustment period was too for him. We just couldn't quite sync up. Lord knows we tried. I will say that if this relationship is what you truly want, please be patient and let it get "THERE". The adjustment period IS hard but you can get past it. I know it'll all work out. :-)

Re: What’s New With Jubi?

Monicaamazing — Fri, 30 Mar 2012 15:11:48 -0000

I still read! Happy for you and Vegas. :)

Re: Is “Tricking Off” A Gender Neutral Activity Now?

Div ONE-A — Wed, 14 Mar 2012 14:59:10 -0000

I guarantee that you know some of these women. Most women aren't going to brag about buying stuff for the ain't sh*t dude in their life--ESPECIALLY after they kick him to the curb. Everybody--or, most people, of either sex--have gone out on a limb for somebody in the name of "being nice". To quote Dwayne Carter, "If I got it to spend, then I got it to give."

And speaking of Mr. Carter, It's still "tricking if you got it." But at this stage of the game, people know what they're paying for. Hailing from the city of sin, I have no issue with grown, consenting adults paying for affection.

Re: Is “Tricking Off” A Gender Neutral Activity Now?

Quinne Lowe — Wed, 14 Mar 2012 11:53:08 -0000

of course it happens, from the lower class chick who moves in her boo that aint working/is trying to get back on his feet to the affluent woman who may not be the best looker... ill never forget this episode of millionare matchmaker where this mudduck essentially picked this tool and during the date, that she planned out and paid for (which if you watch the show is a no no, the men are supposed to lead whether they are the millionare or the date) spoke of how she was going to buy him a motorcycle and shower him with gifts...

i think it boils down in all cases, men or women tricking, to the fact that they have a major shortcoming somewhere and feel that the only way to compensate it, is by buying lust.

I hate when rappers say "it aint tricking if you got it"... shiid yes it is. if I was in their position NO WAY I would be out there over-caking chicks when there are women out there who would date me/sleep with me simply because of who I am. Its nothing wrong with taking women to a upscale restaurant or an expensive event occasionally, but to be flying them cross country, buying wardrobes, cars/houses and im not exclusive with you and not trying to be= SUPER-DUPA-FAILURE...

and because of this cycle, it has caused a warped mentality in society where some women date the dudes that supercakes them and they develop a sense of that should always be done so then the regular dude who wants to holla over-extend himseslf trying to keep up and impress the chick when he shouldnt have to.

Re: Is “Tricking Off” A Gender Neutral Activity Now?

@YeezieTaughtMe — Wed, 14 Mar 2012 10:48:48 -0000

Yes. Sadly women are out chere tricking like its a habit. Buying men all types of clothes shoes and electronics. After my Ex and I broke up his next girl bought him a flat screen after "dating him" for a few months. I asked for her number cuz she ballin and I need that in my life. If he got a flat screen I'd surely get a car out of her. Lol.

Re: BET Has Ruined “The Game”

Miss Lolalaverne — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 21:32:49 -0000

I completely agree, the viewers can no longer relate to the "caricatures". The show quality has gone way down.

Re: Movie Review – “Beats, Rhymes & Life: The Travels of A Tribe Called Quest”

Pinckney33 — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 15:18:51 -0000

Girl!! Speak on it!! He was so peaceful! He is the glue of the group! The fine peacemaker!

Re: Movie Review – “Beats, Rhymes & Life: The Travels of A Tribe Called Quest”

Pinckney33 — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 15:17:10 -0000

You know what, I just saw this documentary four days ago and I fell back in love with the group. Oh what fond memories it rekindled!! I was so amused with that trip down memory lane...also I was BLOWN AWAY by how exclusively fine Ali Shaheed Muhammad is as well! BOY OH BOY! Life is good to him! I need prayer cause I'm on him...lol!!
But the most phenomenal aspect of the movie is Phife Dawg's wife!! CAN SOMEBODY SAY REAL LOVE... sang it Mary! (btw, Mary J, did hug on Ali a lil long...shoot Mary see that jewel).
But yes, Phife'e wife...AMAZING WOMAN OF GOD! That is just LOVE...she so loved her husband that she gave him her KIDNEYYYYY! my my my GOD! I loves it! Anyway the documentary...I must own it. It will be in my personal collection

Re: It’s Not You, It’s Me

D H Shep — Tue, 28 Feb 2012 14:56:41 -0000

Regardless of the situation I commend you for being open and honest. As a fellow Cancer I can advised that we notorious for not saying anything or lying to keep from hurting . The truth heals quicker than a lie. Unfortunately that truth hurts and there's nothing anyone can do about it. And if those guys care, they'll get over it because they really want you to be happy. They'll also be happy to be your safety net in case you fall.

Re: Movie Review – “Safe House”

tiffanyinhouston — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 15:54:26 -0000

For all the reasons you were not wowed by it, are ALL the reasons I will be going to see this. I'm an action flick chick to the core! Plus Denzel! I'm sold.

Re: Movie Review – “Safe House”

melette — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 17:33:55 -0000

I really liked the movie.

Re: Movie Review – “Safe House”

John S. Wilson — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 16:51:03 -0000

lol...ok then. I don't think people find Denzel that old. Maybe your daddy is just young? I mean Liam Neeson is still doing credible action roles and is older than Denzel. But if it doesn't work for you, it doesn't work for you. Ryan Reynolds is the bigger problem. He's one of the worst actors in Hollywood. Every role he chooses he plays in the same fashion as the last. I'll check it out, but I'm not expecting much.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Love

Reecie — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 11:20:01 -0000

"but I do know that the greatest love I’ve ever known, I found with a friend."
me too.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Love

Div ONE-A — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 22:27:15 -0000

I agree. We spend years of our lives cultivating healthy relationships with friends, developing many of the same qualities we say we want in a relationship. And yet, these are the very people many of us overlook. Glad I didn't...

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

JGraham — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 20:49:41 -0000

That's the problem. All those other ideologies did not create marriage. In the same token that I'm not Jewish and therefore have no idea the purpose or proper context of a bar mitzvah, without the example from the author what are you modeling yourself after.
Sadly, to the non-Christian it's no surprise that basing a marriage off of Christ is like sand. Bc sadly without Christ, your life is like sand. What do you have to hope for? What do you rely on beyond your own strength?
I'm not looking at marriage from a specific ideology, I'm looking at marriage from its author and origin. When the purpose of something is unknown, abuse is inevitable.
Oh, and for the record. I am married and a believer in Christ as the key to life.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

tishatweets — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 15:10:13 -0000

I agree--and while I think some singles talk too much about something they really don't know about (no shade, but if you haven't been married you just don't really know), this here is just common sense. I think where many marriages go wrong is that the parties marry strictly for love, believing that will be enough. It will not be. Marriage should definitely be a head choice, and not heart choice. Everything that feels good to you ain't good for you.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

Anthony Springer Jr. — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:41:22 -0000

As a non-Christian, a marriage built on, around or involving a relationship with Christ might as well be built on sand. There's no motivation for me there. But whatever gets folks through the night.

Given that we're running 50/50 on marriage success, I suspect faith alone isn't enough.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

Anthony Springer Jr. — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:38:52 -0000

The divorced dude approves

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

tiffanyinhouston — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:31:38 -0000

For a single person, you are making a helluva a lot of sense. I love my husband with all my being, but there was a "head" decision in deciding to date and then marry him. At some point, I won't be so perky and I will have more gray hair than brown. And once that goes, there has to be something sustainable, something more than just lust.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

Keurejames — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:12:53 -0000

Julissa ...i love you perspectives! Very deep thinking in this one. Thank you for sharing and please...keep em coming!

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

Jubi The Great — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:02:41 -0000

It's a post for tomorrow - what love is & isn't.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

Cameron Khalfani Herman — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 11:43:06 -0000

I laughed at "good head decision." I couldn't pass that one up lol.

Jubi, the way you frame Love in the post makes it seem separate and unrelated from these two factors. Was that intentional? I think the compatibility and mutual benefit are often the foundations for love.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

Jubi The Great — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 09:59:40 -0000

I totally get your point, but here's my thing - you're looking at marriage from a specific ideology. What about all the people who don't subscribe to that ideology? What about Jewish marriages, Muslim marriages, Buddhist marriages, Agnostic marriages, etc?

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

JGraham — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 09:56:10 -0000

I can only agree in parts. The issue with modern American marriage is the idea of it being contractual, symbiotic and ultimately selfish. Too many people enter marriage with a "what's in it for me" mentality; which is understandable bc everything else in our society leads us to be self centered. But marriage was not created by our society, marriage was created by God. And when we attempt to apply a cultural perspective to a divine institution, destruction is inevitable.
Marriage is about love. But as most would agree, that's a word used too lightly. As humans we only have one example of what real love is, that's Jesus. Every other example is tainted by our human, selfish and prideful ways. So if two people "marry", but are not committed to loving with Christ as the example, it shouldn't even be called a marriage. It should be a "civil union." Legally made, contractual expectation and legally broken.

Re: Some Unconventional Thoughts On Marriage

MJones — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 08:52:59 -0000

I totally agree with you. It's definitely got to be about more than love (or lust) and it has to be a good head decision.